


When You're Gone

by xenobia4



Category: JONAS RPF, Jonas Brothers
Genre: Car Accidents, Character Death, Childhood Memories, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-29
Updated: 2018-09-29
Packaged: 2019-07-18 21:16:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,292
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16126892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xenobia4/pseuds/xenobia4
Summary: It's amazing, isn't it? How one single moment in time can change everything.But even this...no one ever expected.





	When You're Gone

**Author's Note:**

> I initially wrote this in a night while listening to Avril Lavigne's "When You're Gone" on repeat. If you know it, this story will have a much bigger impact. And if you play it while reading? Ooo, boy! You're in for a fest!
> 
> Anywho, I know the Jonas Brothers fandom has long since been gone, but I hope there are still a few readers out there. (^ ^)

_“We’re sorry…he didn’t make it.”_

_“D-Didn’t make it? Wh-What do you mean he didn’t make it?”_

_“…I’m sorry.”_

 --

            Kevin sat on the edge of a bed, elbows sitting on his knees, holding a picture frame. His eyebrows were furrowed upwards and he seemed to be lost in thought, eyes staring down at the picture he held in his hands. Sunlight poured in through the window, flooding the otherwise empty bedroom with light. He smiled slightly and ran his thumb across the glass in the frame, a lone tear strolling down the left side of face. He continued to stare at the image, as if he were entranced by it – all concept of thought leaving him.

He looked up and inhaled, before turning his head to look out the window, the weather showing complete irony to the truth. He brought his attention back to the photo and set it on the table that sat by the bed. The picture showed the three brothers from left to right in the order of himself, Nick, and Joe, all smiling, pointing and laughing at something that was off the lens. He stared back out the window, smiling slightly as a memory entered his mind.

_“Come on, guys! That isn’t funny!” a young, nine-year-old Nick cried out to his brothers who were both sitting on a high tree branch._

_Joe held out a small card and pretended to tear it in two pieces. The action caused Nick to start pouting, looking as though he was going to cry._

_“If you want it so bad, then come up and get it!” Kevin called down to his younger brother._

_He nudged Joe in the side and they both began laughing at Nick’s futile attempts to try and climb the tree. He kept trying to jump up and grab the lowest tree branch, but alas, was not tall enough and ended up falling backwards, landing on his bum. He pouted and threw his hands down, hitting the ground before pointing accusingly at his brothers._

_“I’m gonna tell mom!”_

_“How threatening,” Joe said with a sarcastic tone as he stuck out his tongue._

_They both watched as Nick puffed out his cheeks before getting to his feet and running away, vanishing through the front door of the house. After a moment’s pause, both Kevin and Joe began laughing. After a minute or so passed, Kevin shook his head and looked at Joe who gave him a curious stare._

_“I think we should go apologize,” he said simply and watched Joe’s expression turn into an obvious question of ‘why?’ “Dad’s at work and mom’s probably too busy with Frankie or something.”_

_Joe crossed his arms and looked away._

_“Well then you’re gonna be the one to do it because it was your idea!”_

_Kevin shook his head roughly. “How about this! First one to fall out of the tree has to do it!”_

_At this, Joe turned back to face him and gave him a queried look. “But we’ve never fallen out of this tree before.”_

_The moment he finished his sentence, Kevin suddenly had a sly grin cross his face and he gave Joe a harsh shove. Unable to catch his balance, Joe let out a slight yell as he fell off the branch. He hit the ground with a thud and jerked his head to stare angrily at his older brother._

_“Hey! That’s cheating!”_

_Kevin only shrugged, grinning. “Win some; lose some! You gotta go apologize!”_

_Joe paused and glanced away before his eyes landed on something. He extended his hand, letting his fingers enclose around the object. He stared at it for a moment before bringing his attention back to Kevin. Kevin cocked his head, wondering why Joe looked as he did._

_“Think fast!” Joe called out as he threw a baseball towards him._

_Surprised, Kevin jerked back and lost his balance. He was not able to retain it and toppled out of the tree, landing on his back. He sat up and glared at Joe who just stuck out his tongue._

_“Win some; lose some!” he mocked as he got to his feet and took off running around the house._

_Kevin sat there, dumbfounded, before coming back to his senses and taking to his feet. “Get back here, cheater!” he shouted as he ran after his brother, both laughing, their concern about Nick instantly fading._

Tears slid down Kevin’s cheeks as he stared at the tree outside the window. He did not even bother to wipe them away, just kept his gaze focused on the fauna.

**I always needed time on my own**

**I never thought I’d need you there when I cry**

**And the days feel like years when I’m alone**

**And the bed where you lie is made up on your side**

He pulled his gaze away from the window and walked over to the dresser that stood on the opposite side of the room. Pictures of him and Joe as young kids sat on the dresser as well as photo of Kevin holding an infant Nick with Joe peering at the heaped up blanket in his older brother’s arms. Another picture, which was a bit more recent, was one that had a sixteen-year-old Joe and an eighteen-year-old Kevin, arms slung over each other’s shoulders, smiling as they looked at the camera.

He clamped his eyes shut and shook his head.

_“I said I was sorry!” a fourteen-year-old Joseph yelled at his older brother._

_“But you’re not!” Kevin shouted back, face red, obviously furious. “You always manage to screw up everything with your stupid jokes and idiocy!”_

_Joe furrowed his brows and clenched his jaw. “Don’t blame me because you can’t take a joke!!”_

_“Joke?!” Kevin cried out as he shoved his brother. “You screwed up everything tonight! Because you don’t know when to just shut up and quit! I told you not to bother me and what do you do?! You screw up everything! Kathy didn’t find it funny and neither did I!!”_

_Joe stared at a section of his dresser, keeping his eyes off of his brother as he tried to think of a retort._

_“This was my one chance to do something nice for her and you couldn’t even give me one damn night! I told you to just stay in your room and leave us alone! Mom and Dad put me in charge of watching you and I figured that once – just once – that you could keep to yourself!”_

_Joe said nothing, just continued to stare at his dresser and the paraphernalia strewn across it. “I said I was sorry,” he said in a low voice, barely understandable._

_“Which is nothing than a load of crap! I swear,” Kevin continued as he ran his hand through his hair. “We would be a whole lot better off if you weren’t even here!”_

_At this, Joe jerked his head back up to face his brother and he shook his head. “The feeling’s mutual! I don’t want to be around you anyway!” he shouted as he shoved passed his brother and stormed out of the room._

_Kevin continued to stare at the door, brows still furrowed, anger and annoyance still flooding threw him. He heard the front door open before slamming shut. Some of the things on Joe’s dresser fell down and he huffed.  
_

**When you walk away I count the steps that you take**

**Do you see how much I need you right now?**

Kevin shook his head and bit his bottom lip as the scenario continued to play like a tape in his head.

_Kevin strolled up and down the streets, trying to keep an eye out for his brother, hoping he would see him even despite the lack of sunlight. He sighed when he still could not locate him and he glanced at his watch. It was almost eleven and the lump in his stomach seemed to get heavier. He jerked his head around when he thought he heard something, but it turned out to be no more than a cat jumping out of the bushes and strolling across the street._

Joe, where are you?

_He continued to think about what he had said earlier that evening and grew even more nervous when he recalled that had been hours ago. He decided to walk one more round around the neighborhood before returning back home to see if maybe Joe had gone back. What seemed like hours later, he was just about to head back when he saw the silhouette of a person sitting on the edge of the sidewalk, knees pulled to their chest, hands wrapped around them._

_He approached them from behind and called out, not wanting to risk it being someone else._

_“Joe?”_

_The figure tensed and shook his head._

_“Go away.”_

_He released a sigh of relief when his brother’s voice was what came out. He moved and sat down next to him, knees bend and forearms set on them. They stayed like that in silence for a minute or so before Kevin spoke._

_“It’s a cool night out.”_

_There was no reply._

_“Maybe we should…head back and get warmed up?” he suggested as he turned his head to look at Joe, who turned his head in the opposite direction. He sighed again and turned back to face the front and stare up at the starlit sky._

_When Joe finally spoke, Kevin turned to look at him. “I thought you didn’t want me around you.”_

_Kevin did not reply at that moment, but instead leaned over and pushed his brother slightly with his shoulder. “C’mon. You know I wasn’t being serious.”_

_“Sounded like it to me.”_

_He pursed his lips together._

_“People say dumb things when they’re angry, ya know?” he said, looking back to the sky. “And I’m sorry I blew up on you. I just wanted everything to go perfectly tonight with Kathy…but hey.” He shifted his arm and wrapped it around Joe’s shoulders. “I would much rather have my little brother than some girlfriend. And if they can’t accept both of us, then they’re not worth it.”_

_He waited for Joe to reply and it was a while before he did._

_“You’re lying,” he finally said, turning to face Kevin. “You would much rather have a snot-nosed girlfriend than hang out with me.”_

_“Hm…you’re right. I’m lying. I’m sorry.”_

_They went silent before both busted out laughing. Kevin gave Joe a small squeeze as his younger brother set his head on his shoulder.  
_

Kevin brought up his hand and covered his mouth as he released broken sobs. He tried to wipe the tears away, but they kept coming back.

**When you’re gone**

**The pieces of my heart are missing you**

**When you’re gone**

**The face I came to know is missing, too**

**When you’re gone**

**The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it okay…**

**I miss you….**

He sunk to his knees, palms on the floor when he spotted one of Joe’s shirts lying on the floor. He looked at it for a moment before slowly reaching out his hand and grabbing it. He slowly brought it back to him before clutching it close to his chest, as if it were some prized treasure. His cries became more distinct and he curled downwards, still on his knees, eyes clamped shut as he continued to cling to the navy-blue polo shirt.

**I’ve never felt this way before**

**Everything that I do reminds me of you**

**And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor**

**And they smell just like you,**

**I love the things that you do.**

_“Hey! Watch it, would ya?! I can’t drive if you keep doing that!”_

_“Sorry , Kev!”_

_Joe turned and reached into the back seat, groping around for a bag. Kevin gave a quick sideways glance before quickly bringing his eyes back to the dark, wet road in front of him._

_“What are you getting, anyway?” he asked as Joe faced back to the front of the car, bag in tow._

_He opened it and began digging around for something or other. He did not reply right away. He seemed too intent on finding whatever it was he was looking for. The plastic, generic bag rustled as he continued to dig around inside the bag._

_“We did buy gum while we were at the gas station, right?” Joe asked, looking up at Kevin before going right back to looking in the bag._

_Kevin nodded as he turned on the windshield wipers to max, the rain pounding on the outside of the car. “Yeah. You wouldn’t stop bugging me because you didn’t have eighty cents to get it. How could I forget?”_

_Joe snorted at the comment, as did Kevin before Joe let out a cry of joy._

_“Ah-ha! I found it!” he said triumphantly as he pulled the pack of gum from the bag and held it up like a trophy. He grinned as he faced his brother. “You never let me down, Kev!”_

_As he began to open the package, Kevin nodded conceitedly. “I know. That’s what brothers are for.”_

_“Yeah, yeah,” was the reply as Joe put an unwrapped stick into his mouth. He looked at Kevin. “Want a piece?”_

_He shook his head._

_“Nah. Thanks, though.”_

_Joe shrugged. “Your loss,” he said as he sealed the pack and tossed it back into the bag. He turned around to put the bag back in the rear seat._

_As they approached the dark intersection, both failed to see the eighteen-wheeled truck coming up on the T-intersection without its headlights on. As Joe turned back to face the front, he only spotted it because the headlights from their car reflected off the reflectors from the side-paneling of the truck for a split-second. He inhaled and practically shouted._

_“KEVIN! WATCH IT!!”_

_The car tires screeched as Kevin slammed down on the brake. There was a sound of metal colliding._

**When you walk away, I count the steps that you take**

**Do you see how much I need you right now?**

_“Hold on! Just…just hold on, okay?!”_

_A totaled car sat in the middle of the road flipped onto its side. An eighteen wheeler was stopped feet away and shouts were barely heard above the pouring rain._

_“Joe! Hold on!”_

_Kevin sat in the middle of the road, less than a foot away from the totaled vehicle, holding his brother on his lap, hand running through Joe’s sopping wet hair as Joe tried to remain conscious. His eyelids continued to flutter open as he tried to force them to stay open. Blood coveted the side of his head where a large gash lay on the right side of his head._

_Kevin’s eyes were wide as he continued to try and keep his brother awake._

_“You’re gonna be okay, Joe! Just hold on!” He looked around frantically to the stopped trucked a few hundred feet away. “HELP!! Somebody!! Call an ambulance!! Call someone!! We need help!!” He jerked his head back to face his brother when he heard gargled coughs. “Joe! You’re gonna be okay! You’re gonna be okay…!”_

_Tears slid down his cheeks, hidden by the pouring rain._

_“K-Kevin…,” Joe said quietly, but forced._

_“Don’t talk…just…just save your energy, all right?”_

_He continued to run his fingers through his brother’s hair._

_“It hurts…Kevin. Really bad…,” he trailed off, his breaths becoming fast and rigid._

_“You’re gonna be all right, Joe...you’re gonna be fine.”_

_Joe’s eyes fluttered again and closed. His breathing became short, quick gasps._

_“Joe…?!”_

_Hearing his name, he forced his eyes to open, but they would not focus on anything. He swallowed and returned back to fast and shallow breathing._

_“I-I can’t see anything, Kevin!” he cried out as his eyes darted around, as if searching for light._

_“Hold on, Joe!! Help’s on the way!” He jerked his head back to the still stopped truck, but no one was coming out. “Call an ambulance, damn it!”_

_“I-I can’t see!” He quickly focused his attention back to his brother, his grip tightening around him. Joe swallowed again before letting out a loud gasp._

_“Joe…Joe…Joe…no-no-no…. Come on, Joey...come on.”_

_“I love you…Kev…,” Joe said, hardly in a whisper._

_The softness of his voice was such a difference that Kevin easily picked it up. He forced a smile and looked at his brother, running his thumb across his cheek now._

_“I love you, too, buddy. I love you, too.”_

_Joe’s jaw tensed and he stared down, eyes still shaking, obviously not focusing._

_“I – I can’t…feel my legs….” He trailed off before taking in one last inhale._

_His body fell limp and for a moment, Kevin said nothing, only stared at his brother, waiting for him to say something again, or breathe. His breath hitched when all movement ceased from his younger brother._

_“Joe?” He began running his fingers though his brother’s hair again. “Joe? Come on, Joey. Wake up.” His breath continued to hitch and the tears began strolling more violently down his face. “Wake up…please wake up. Please…wake up. Don’t do this….”_

_He held Joe’s body tightly, hugging him, sobs breaking from his throat. “Wake up, damn it!!” he screamed at him before pulling up, looking around. “Somebody!! Anybody!! HELP!! CALL AN AMBULANCE!! DO SOMETHING!! SOMEONE!!” He looked around but saw no movement. “Please...someone…help….”_

**We were made for each other**

**Out here forever**

**I know we were**

**All I ever wanted was for you to know**

**Everything I’d do, I’d give my heart and soul**

**I can hardly breathe**

**I need to feel you here with me**

_The family sat in the waiting room at the hospital, waiting to hear word on Joe. Finally, a doctor in a while coat stepped out of the emergency room and approached the family. The parents stood up, waiting for him to speak – praying…hoping. Kevin Sr. had his arm around his wife’s shoulder and watched as the doctor shook his head._

_“I’m sorry.”_

_Denise Jonas clenched her eyes shut and Kevin Sr. embraced his wife as she broke down crying, face buried in her husband’s shirt. Nick, who had been sitting, shook his head, almost not believing what the doctor had said. This could not happen. He could not lose his brother. Frankie sat next to Nick, feet on the chair, knees curled to his chest. Kevin leaned against the wall and broke down, sliding to the floor, hands covering his face._

**I always needed time on my own**

**I never thought I’d need you there when I cry**

**And the days feel like years when I’m alone**

**And the bed where you lie is made up on your side**

Kevin knelt on the floor in his brother’s room, curled up, still holding onto his shirt as tears slid down his cheeks. The entire night played in slow motion within his mind and past events continued to roll like a VHS tape in fast-forward, taunting him – showing him everything. All the moments with his family and with his brother.

Moments that he would never be able to experience…ever again.

**When you’re gone**

**The pieces of my heart are missing you**

**When you’re gone**

**The face I came to know is missing, too**

**When you’re gone**

**The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it okay…**

**I miss you…**

* * *

_Motor vehicle crashes are the leading cause of death among 15- to 20-year olds._

_According to the U.S. Department of Transportation, 2,820 drivers in this age group died in motor vehicle crashes in 2017 and an additional 261,000 were injured._

**Author's Note:**

> Please let me know your thoughts.  
> I initially wrote this after we lost a classmate in a car accident due to a drunk driver. 
> 
> After losing my own brother (not to a drunk driver), just re-reading this makes me cry.


End file.
